I’ve asked my mum, and she says I must’ve been around 7 or 8 when it started. I was sitting on the floor of Mrs. Malhotra’s flat where she took her weekly art class, a phase of my life featured prominently whenever I made my mental ‘phases-I-wish-I-remembered-more-of’ list. I had just finished painting my last drawing, a castle of some sort, and was waiting for my next assignment, when the boy seated to my left, my best friend of 3 years, Aditya thought aloud, “We should do a Tintin picture”.

Admittedly, I had read Tintin comics before this. My mother had brought home my first one as soon as she’d heard Veena Aunty was opening a library less than two hundred metres away from my building. I’d read it, and I’d enjoyed it, and because back then Adi and I shared everything, including books and opinions, he’d enjoyed it too. But we weren’t crazy. Oh no, we got crazy after we started drawing.

Suddenly, it was absolutely necessary that we get our hands on every Tintin comic we possibly could. Veena Aunty’s library was quickly exhausted and we began looking for other ones. I remember begging my mum to drive over to a new library we’d heard had opened near a friend’s house and rushing in only to head straight for the pile of Tintins. There was an extremely satisfying feeling we’d get just by turning a Tintin book over in our hands, looking through a list of the entire series and counting how many we had left. The list itself would vary, depending on how old the edition in our hands was. This meant some titles would appear and disappear randomly, leading us to figure out that a few of them were simply a bit too rare to find in any random library.

I couldn’t explain to you what we saw in those books. Quite frankly, they were nothing special. Certainly not the sort that can make you laugh out loud, but I suppose back then when we were kids we did find it amusing to read about what sort of trouble the young reporter and his foul-mouthed friend Captain Haddock had gotten themselves in to. Later though, when these comics just stopped seeming all that funny, I can only say they had started to mean more to us than books do. They had just become something we had to finish. A goal we’d set out to achieve, so to speak.

Years went by and we never got tired of driving to new bookstores. The 21 covers that featured consistently on the back of every Tintin and the 1 based on the movie were now old bait. We were after rarer books now. Tintin and the Land of  Soviets was the very first one, so old its artwork looked alien. Tintin in the Congo was so  unspeakably rare, nobody even seemed to have heard of it. And Tintin and the Alph-Art was the last, the incomplete one, the one author Herge had passed away before finishing. Imagine our feeling of anguish when we spotted the latter for the first time in a Crosswords store, but realized that at 650 rupees for a hardbound copy there was  no way our mothers would agree to buying it for us. For a long time, that was how we left it. 3 books to go. 3 more till the finish.

Recently the interest in Tintin comics has picked up once again. Ever  since Steven Spielberg announced  he was working with Peter Jackson to produce the ultimate movie adaptations of The Adventures of Tintin wherein he would use motion-capture technology to create a happy medium between the animated cartoons we saw on Cartoon Network and the 1960s live-action French movies starring Jean-Pierre Talbot, I’ve been scanning the net for all the news I can find about the planned films. Having seen the trailers, I’m embarrassed to say they still look like ordinary cartoons to me, but nevertheless I’m happy this is happening.

A few months ago, I noticed both the Soviet book as well as the Alph-Art in Landmark Bookstore, Pune, and realised these books weren’t considered rare any more. It had been years since my last Tintin experience, and I took my chance. I bought the former and gifted it to Adi for his birthday, knowing he’d only give it to me for a read once he was done. I then sat down and spent an hour  in Landmark, and finished Tintin and the Alph-Art. There. 1 more to go.

Tintin in the Congo, that last title still remains. That single book whose cover you’ll never find on the back of any other Tintin still continues to elude me. It’s on my Bucket List you know? I have a rather  nice list of things I’d like to do before I die. Reading all 25 books from the Tintin series is entry #16. As I said earlier, these books are hardly considered rare any more. Just google the title and you’ll find links to a Flipkart page offering to sell you this one for as little as 500 rupees, an amount far less than what I’d be willing to pay for a book I’ve been chasing my entire childhood. But I can never bring myself to order it online. Somehow, that, for me, just defeats the purpose of putting that entry into my List in the first place.

The objective, you see, wasn’t to read the books themselves. Tintin is not great literature. Hell, it’s not  even that funny. When my mother brought home my first Tintin, her intention wasn’t to make me a fanatic. It was simply to get me to love my first book. It was to get me to visit more bookstores. It was to make me actually WANT to visit libraries. And by God, it worked brilliantly.

I therefore wait patiently, for the day I walk into a bookstore and spot the cover I’ve been looking for for over a decade now. I wait for that rush. I wait for that feeling that ordering a book on the net can never get me. Till then, as the rest of the world clamours after the upcoming flick Spielberg’s got them all so excited about, I continue with my usual routine. Heard of a new bookstore? Allow me to visit it. In between my usual tours through the Christies and the Archers and other gifts my mother gave me, I’ll take time to take a look at the comic section. Who knows? Maybe I’ll be sending Adi a courier soon.

It was the first day of our sophomore year, here at BITS and we all friends, gathered there and started discussing our summer.
“The coolest thing about my summer was my cousin’s wedding.”
“Guys, we should seriously plan a trip to Manali, It is literally heaven on earth.”
“Hey look at her! Who’s she? That girl over there in black with those curvy locks!”
“Sonia Mehra, our batch, EnI, Delhi, Music Club, and if you trust Pinky, then she’s single.” This guy had information (even statistical) on bloody each and every girl on campus. We just used to call him ‘baba’.
“She is the most gracious person I have ever seen. I mean, just look at her. She has an aura around her.”
“Go start a conversation with her, if you like her so much.”
“Umm, not now, there are many people around her.”

It was my first MT1 Biology lab. I was standing inside in my white apron, just starting to listen to the teacher trying to explain to us the concept of DNA extraction, when Sonia Mehra entered the room. And again, Sonia, with her panache, left me awe-struck.
That’s when I made it a point that I must start talking to her. So, in an attempt to come to her notice, I paid attention and gave some impressive answers.
She was standing right there on the other side of the table.

I looked at her, she looked at me and she turned her back.

Another fine evening, we were at John Seagull’s.
“Pearl Harbor is the best movie. Ever! I have seen it for like four to five times and I still can’t get past it. Ben Affleck and Kate Beckinsale chemistry, that war-hero feel, the true essence of friendship. This movie is epic!”
“Kate Beckinsale was just amazing in serendipity!”
“Guys is this, what you call serendipity?” Sitting on the last visible table was Sonia in a gorgeous blue dress, with the smile of an angel.
Also sitting next to our table were two other people from our college. Apparently, they had taken in a lot of booze and were totally knocked out. We thought of giving them a hand. We helped them out with getting a bit sober, figuring out their bill and ensuring they reach campus in our hired cab.
“Do you think she might have noticed this?”
“No clue, dude! ”

I looked at her, she looked at me and she turned her back.

Nirmaan had organized a Blood Donation Camp on campus. It was indeed a great initiative and we decided to play our part in it.
Sonia was there too and somehow, I was indeed expecting her to be there.
I was lying there with the needle taking the blood out. Blood donation actually feels good.
I could also see Sonia standing at a distance, talking to someone.

I looked at her, she looked at me and she turned her back.

Next week, back there at the MT1 laboratory, we were supposed to calculate the net energy produced on the decomposition of a green pea.
I had decided earlier on, that no matter what, I am definitely striking up a conversation with her today. We were also supposed to centrifuge a sample, but something went wrong. A group member had forgotten to close down on the lid and BOOM ! The whole green pea paste blew out from the pump. I was standing there in my white apron, no longer white. With my face stained in green, I looked like a bad attempt of The Incredible Hulk.
‘I should definitely not let Sonia see me like this’ I thought. But it was too late. She was there standing right behind me.

I looked at her, she looked at me and she smiled.

         ……..

Then, some disturbing, squeaky noise from the tv breaks him from the sleep. He, first tries to ignore it, but then, opens his eyes. Turning sideways, he sees the wallclock that shows 10am. The first thing that strikes him was that he missed the football match he had at 6 in the morning.

He seems sad, but realises nothing can be done now and sits up. Seeing the tv on, with his mom watching a reality show on it, he screams at her, “Why the hell are you watching this silly khatron ke khiladi in the morning? Didn’t you see it the last night!” His mom understands that he screamed due to the anger within, for not being able to wake up early for the match. She kindly replies, “should i decrease the volume? You want to sleep more ?”
“No, i’m awake now,” said Rohit.
“Okay, i was watching it because its happening here only, they are shooting in Delhi today, near Dwarka. Just today, and its coming live.”
“Are you serious?”
“Yes! Why would i watch the repeat telecast, that also at 10am?!”
“Wow…! Which sector ? Did they give the exact address? “
“Somewhere near Dwarka Mod metro station. That location is kind of silent n alone place, perfect for the show! “
“Okay, i’m leaving then in 20minutes. I want to see the shooting. Will have breakfast after coming back.”
“Areeey…But,….you have to have something before leaving.”
“Maaa…i’ll have something, there are lots of food stalls at metro stations. You don’t worry! ” he winked.

25minutes he took for getting brushed up, and he left the home at 10.25. He boarded into the metro heading towards dwarka, the same way as he used to go every alternate day, for IIT coaching classes. The metro looked the same, the people, and everything else was regular and the way it used to be.  But, what was going to happen was not regular. He was excited. Even though it was just a TV show. Being a Delhi-ite, one rarely gets to see a Show or a Movie Shooting. He was going to be one. He was happy and anxious.

He looked at his wristwatch. It was 11.05. He had heard faintly on the TV, while waking up, that its the semi-finals, which meant more stunts and so, the show wasn’t going to be over within 1 hour. He was walking in the streets of dwarka at this time, the ones which were usually dirty, had no homes, was silent during night time, and an iron machines’ factory worked in the daylight. To shorten up, it was a good place for the shooting of horror movies at night. He had been to these streets once, when he bunked his classes. But, since the street had nothing interesting, he had never gone there again.
Walking some more, he found a huge crowd screaming and shouting just like once he had seen people doing in a movie shoot that happened in Delhi long ago but he wasn’t allowed to go there as he was small. Now, he was big. Almost an adult. He could handle himself, he thought and reached the crowd.
When he was awakened at home and discussing about the show with mom, he had seen some stunt was going on related to steel glasses. How blessed was he that day with luck that the very same stunt was still going on…ofcourse, with another contestant. Maybe, it was the semi-finals so the stunts were of longer duration, he thought. He was even happier now that he had not missed any stunt.
5 Minutes later, his cellphone rang with the same tone it had rung in the party last night. It was from dad’s office. That also meant, he had to answer it. So, he moved some steps away from the dense crowd and answered it.
“Hello.”
“Hello, is this Rohit ? “
“Yes, who’s this ? “
“Rohit, i’m Suresh Uncle talking.”
“Oh, ya, Hello uncle. How are you ? “
“I’m good…but…”
“What happened, uncle? “
“Beta, i’m sorry to say, but your dad has passed away….”
“What are you talking, uncle? What ?! What happened?!?!”
“Even we don’t know beta, he was just standing in his cabin, suddenly, his head started to pain, and he fell off due to the strain and in minutes his heart stopped pumping and till the time doctors reached, he had passed away.”

The crowd suddenly started to seem less lively. The iron machines’ sound was not irritating him anymore. Though his eyes still told him he was standing in mid of a street in Dwarka, he felt as if he fell in a black hole; silent, and dark. The darkness was dense. The place seemed so silent that even after he placed his second hand on his heart, he couldn’t hear or sense a single heartbeat.
That 1 moment was unimaginable, unbearable and hurtful. Only a month ago, had the same tragedy happened with his cousin sister. Now, it was his turn, he thought. As the images of ‘how hurt her sister was’, rolled through his brain, he decided, he can’t be like her. He knew how much she had cried. He was not going to be the same. All this was one long thought of the moment. Then he answered the call again, which he had hung up after the news was given by Suresh Uncle.
“Hello,… ” in an afraid voice, he continued. “..uncle.”
“Beta, suno…tum…”
He interrupted, “Uncle, have you told it to mom?”
He was worried about his mom. His Mom and Dad didn’t have a Very Good relationship, but they were together at all times when the life was harsh at any. There was some Love between the two but they didn’t used to show it. Knowing all this, he thought, if the news had gone to mom(answer to which seemed most probably yes) she must would have broke up and would be weeping at home.
He didn’t care to think about the show once more and started walking towards the nearest metro station.
“Yes, she and your Tayaji (father’s brother) and Bua (father’s sister) have been told about this through other colleagues of your dad.”
“Okay, uncle, i’ll talk to you later,” said he, hung up the phone and speeded towards Dwarka Mod station.
When he had reached Uttam Nagar, that’s his station, he swiftly ran across the stairs, jumped a few and continued his run towards the home.
While passing through a street that was at 3 minutes distance from his home, he found 2 of his best friends talking at gate of home of one of them. Shrey and Akshay, he noticed. He felt, seeing them slowed him down a bit, so he again started sprinting. He didn’t have any time to look up to them, smile and go n hug each of them. His only priority in the world at that time was his Mom. He had to rush as fast as he could. As he was passing close to the 2 guys, he could faintly hear what they were talking about. They were looking at Rohit, and rohit was staring at them but he was walking as fast as he could now.
He read their lips or expressions or what, he didn’t know. Somehow, he could make out what they talked about.

Shrey(after seeing Rohit running away) : hey, do you know why he’s running so fast ?
Akshay : Ya, dude. Didn’t you get to know about what happened early morning?
Shrey : Nope. Tell me.
Akshay : His dad passed away…
Shrey : What?! Are you serious?
Akshay : Ya, bhai. Why would i crack a joke like this ? I pity him yaar, he’s the only son.
Shrey : ya, poor him. Good, that his mother is working. Otherwise, kya hota unka?! Toh? Ab Chalna hai ek baar uske ghar ?  (Otherwise, how would they have managed ?.. Anyways, shouldn’t we go once to meet them?)
Akshay : Yes, we should, my mom told me. Ho aayege yaar ek baar. Usey acha lagega.
Shrey : i hope so too. So, when should we go ?
Akshay : 3pm would be fine.
Shrey : k. So whattup for now? I had come for some gaming, if you remember.

….and only this much Rohit could hear and bear.
He started looking straight, he didn’t want to look at them, rather. But, as soon as he was to think about what kind of friends are they, he was again remembered of her mom. He again hurried, and slowed down just when he had entered his colony. Now he thought, how he has to handle it all. “It was all on him now, Responsibilities, Looking after hisself and his Mother, he had to do it now. He has to be courageous and act brave. He has to leave dependancy. He has to be the new father. The new head of the house. ” he said to himself.
As soon as he had ended with the thought, he had put in his first step in the house. It was opened. Lots of chappals were there outside the gate just like they are at a temple. He entered the home and went to the second room where his Mom was weeping with his cousin brothers and his tayaji around her. As soon as she saw him, she came running to him. He had seen almost the same view a month ago(when it happened to her cousin sister). He was shocked at that time(month ago) as he was seeing this all for the first time. But now, he knew how it all happens-How much does a wife feels. He hugged her hard and tried not to cry.
Still, he couldn’t stop the tears. He was still a 17 year old Boy, afterall. But he wiped them away with his hand and patted on his mother’s back. He reminded himself, he had to act strong. He doesn’t have to be like his sister was. He had to be the reason for living. For life, of  him and his mother.
As he was talking to his mom holding her in his arms, his tayaji went outside for asking about the body and his brothers told him, they’ll be back in 20minutes. Meanwhile, he took her mom to the 3rd room. The room that didn’t have any picture or photograph of his dad. Just so that it would help him make her mom stop crying.
It was his room. A room, totally dedicated to him. There were posters of Eminem on the wall and the plasma and the computer turned on. As they moved a bit, the mouse got a bit disturbed and the screensaver vanished making the window that was opened appear again. It was “Thapar College Admission Letter.” Thapar is one of the best Private institutes of India for Engineering. He had worked hard for getting it. But, it was in Punjab. His priority was still his mom. He made her sit, gave her a glass of water and said, “Mom, i’m not leaving you. I’ll get admission in some college, here in delhi. I would be with you each n every moment and we’ll live our life together now. I’ll live for you and you for me. We’ll work together. There’s no need to cry.” and wiped her tears with his hand “Dad is with us. He’s up there, seeing us two, and he’s happy. God loved his soul and was missing him, so he took him back. But, we still have our lives left. And, we’ll work it out together.” She gave him a smile, tears were still dropping down her cheeks. Maybe, now they were also due to happiness. Happiness of the maturity his son showed. He hugged her…

…

And then, a disturbing squeaky sound came. Like, one of falling down of a steel glass or something similar. His eyes partially opened. He turned sideways and saw the wallclock. It said 10.10am. The first thing that striked him, was that he’s still on his sofa. Shocked, he sat up in a sudden action. Khatron ke Khiladi was still going on on the TV. His mom was still watching it. The same stunt was going on, with a third contestant. It was the semi-finals.
“Good morning! Don’t be shocked, you’ve lost the chance of going off for the football match. Its 10.10 now! “
“Mom, that’s okay,” answered rohit with a confused face and continued. “Is this Khatron ke khiladi happening in Delhi? “
“??? . . . . No…! Why would that happen? They are shooting in Cape town, South Africa. What happened? “
He passed a short smile and replied, ” No, nothing… “
As, he was passing by his mom, going towards washroom, he again asked mom, “Why are you watching this silly Khatron ke khiladi in the morning? Didn’t you watch it last night ? “
“No, i didn’t. Remember? We had all gone to Suresh uncle’s party. So, i’m watching the repeat telecast.”
“Oh, ya, i remember it!” said he and walked away from living room to his room. Again, a short smile rested on his face.

He sat on a couch, he had in his room and started thinking about the dream.
Though, he was sure now, it was all a dream. A Dream within a dream to be precise. A dream that would be called as ‘A Nightmare’ by many.  A dream that had a great impact on him. He knew, it was all a dream. A dream, something, that’s not real. Still, he felt a bit worried for a moment about his father. Was he fine at the office? Should he call once to enquire?
But, then, he thought again, that’s exactly why he had seen the dream. He knew what he had to do, if something (god forbid) like that ever happens. He knew exactly what he had to do! So, he didn’t make a call.

Later that night, he was chatting with his girlfriend on facebook and his dad arrived. He told her, he’ll talk to her later. As his dad made his entrance to the living room, he took the bag from dad and asked him if he needs water. Also, the first time, in his entire life, he asked his father, ”how was the day?”

He also learnt a lot about ‘dreams’ that day, but that’s not needed in this post.

P.S. This is taken from my blog. Hope that’s not plagiarism.

“Last call for the passengers travelling to Nagpur by Indigo SG-112. Kindly proceed for boarding.” I woke with a start. I always had the knack of delaying things till the last moment. Then be it delaying the washing of my socks until I saw someone sitting next to me walking off due to the unbearable smell or be it completing that power point presentation at the last minute where I had no other option but to use the readymade templates (I hate those presenters and presentations which use the readymade templates. It just shows that you didn’t give a damn while making the presentation). I always believed that delaying things gave me that extra bit of time and that the moments of desperation brought the best out of me. Honestly, my theories had no explanations but then no one cared enough to demand one!

My theory was being seen in practice at the Mumbai airport. I got up from my seat immediately, allowing the smiling faces of Virat Kohli and Genelia D’souza on the front page of India Today to kiss the ground. While at the airport I tried very hard to read these magazines but they always got the better of me. Then be it Forbes, Entrepreneur or News Week all had me starting off with wide open eyes and ended up with these magazines lying upside down on my lap and my eyes shut deeply in the meditative state some people call sleep. As in this case, the editorial was enough to send me off dozing. I put back the magazine in the shelf and hurried towards the queue which was proceeding for boarding. I was the second last person in the queue. Perhaps content with the fact that there was one more person on this planet who believed in my theory of delaying things.

16-E that’s what my boarding pass read when I looked under the seat No column. I took my seat. A middle aged plump lady sitting on 16-C was trying desperately to buckle her seat belt but all in vain. No woman likes being called fat and to be reminded of that fact by a seat belt only added to her despair. Every ounce of that despair was clearly being seen on her face. She had to eventually call up the airhostess to help her put on the seat belt. Asking a woman with a perfect figure to help you out in a problem which has arisen precisely because of you lacking one, is something that is indeed agonizing. Agreed and approved, “being a woman is tough.”

I slowly removed a Jeffery Archer novel from my hand bag. Honestly, I hate reading books. This was just an attempt at testing the authenticity of the phrases like “books are our best friends”,”books help you grow as a human”. I wondered how, I mean the idea of books being best friends was too sappy, something that even a 2^nd grader wouldn’t fall for  and as in matters of growth as a human, I had grown well enough without them. Why Jeffery Archer? Well a 20 year old reading J.K Rowling would have looked a tad too embarrassing and the novel which I was reading-“The Eleventh Commandment-Thou Shalt Not Be Caught”  was a bestseller in New York. (A bit more research would have revealed that every other novel published in New York claims itself to be a bestseller.) I opened the first chapter.

“Excuse me”….came a soft voice from behind. The voice was accompanied with a smell of lavender.

I slowly looked sideways and there she was……….

A young girl in her early 20’s wearing a red t-shirt and a blue jeans with her hair let loose holding a  Gucci handbag in one hand  and a BlackBerry in other. She was about 5 feet six (might be a bit more or a bit less but Google says that the average height of young girls today is 5’6 and I’m someone who has never managed to get past the averages), with a skin that could redefine the term “fair”.

(Wow…it took me 81 words to describe the physical appearance of a girl. It’s so simple when you are doing the same in front of a bunch of guys).

I was reading a quote on her t-shirt (You never do that when a girl is standing merely 2 feet away from you and is looking straight at you. I mean, you must be actually reading the quote but girls manage to read between the lines. I was genuinely reading the quote.) That’s when she said again…

“EXCUSE ME!!!”…..this time in a tone that sounded more like a warning than a request. I clutched my feet together and moved them sideways so that I could let her in. She took her seat. She opened the speed dial tab of her phone, dialed a number and started talking. This time I was cautious enough not to look at her directly. I started listening intently.

“Yes….just boarded the flight.”

“Hmm….had a sandwich and a coke.”

“Okk…. You don’t worry…I’ll take care.”

“ Love you!”…..

Damn!! She had a boyfriend.

“bbye…..mammee….”..

Mammee…..she didn’t have a boyfriend!!! Time was ripe for me to swoop in.

With all the courage I could muster I spoke out………

“Mothers…. I tell you…..very caring …aren’t they…”…..Mothers are very caring, is that the first line you ever say to a girl??? I had already kicked myself in my head.

“What?”……came a reply. I knew I hadn’t really started off well.

I turned my head away from her and started peeping back into my book thinking of what should be my next line. The wait wasn’t too long because she was the one who asked me…

“So you an Archer fan?”…..

Wow…..does someone reading the book of a particular author for the first time qualify to be his fan?  I had to answer……I thought I’d be honest and tell her that I’m not much of a reader and this was just to kill my time in the flight . But then I’d be a guy who reads quotes on girls’ t-shirts , asks them about their mothers and doesn’t read books……that really didn’t sound good.

“A huge fan!” I said. I don’t know why I said huge.

“Me not really. I mean yes Kane and Abel was a masterpiece but their sequels ‘The Prodigal Daughter’ and ‘Shall We Tell The President’ they weren’t so intriguing”. She replied back and by the time she had completed her sentence I had my heart in my mouth.

What was a masterpiece and what and what were intriguing I had no clue. Why didn’t I just say no! Her next question only sank me deeper into my state of uneasiness.

“Your views”…

My views! ……only If I knew what they were.

“Well………” 5 seconds….that much long I kept saying the word ‘well’.

‘Thou Shalt Not Be Caught’ and my state was completely contrary to it.  I had to change the topic. But she had already turned around her head perhaps convinced with the fact that I really wasn’t much of a reader (barring the T-shirt quotes).

For the next 30 minutes I didn’t say a word. Meanwhile she had had a cup of coffee, and a chocolate muffin I on the other hand pretended to be too busy reading the book. Wouldn’t deny that it was a desperate attempt to redeem myself. Any hopes of redemption soon bit the dust with my next sentence-

“Do you believe in this whole fuss of size-zero, I think you don’t because you don’t seem to be one”……

I knew I was never really good at conversing with girls and honestly I had been trying a lot to improve upon this. At times even having imaginary conversations in my head in which  I portrayed myself to be very charming so much that every time I would end up getting a girl’s phone number (Not just me, every guy has done it at some point in time). But here in the last 30 minutes my conversational skills had touched a new low. I had gone from being bad to worse and was now to be buried in my grave of shamelessness and folly. My cremation began-

“Listen mister…I really don’t know what’s going on in your head but whatever it is you don’t seem to be a normal guy.”

Her fair cheeks had turned red and now her finger was pointing at me (she was decent enough to point her index finger). She continued-

“If I appear to be a girl who you think is going to give into these cheap and despicable tactics of yours, you are mistaken. By the way I have a boyfriend and my father works in army and he will be standing right there at the entrance to receive me. Any more of such nuisance and you have no idea what trouble you will land yourself into”…….

It took me a couple of seconds to gather back my composure. I had patches of sweat above my lips and my eyebrows. Never before was I so emotionally molested. I had heard stories of girls castigating guys for their weird behavior but to be in the midst of one, wasn’t really a pretty feeling.

I yet again turned towards my book.

“F**k  Archer!”….I said to myself. There was no point pretending anything now. I shut the book, put it in my bag hastily and closed my eyes.  Maybe I should have taken the quote on her t-shirt more seriously which had read ‘don’t mess with me’ (see I told you, I was actually reading the quote)

Here I was again, making a mockery of myself in front of a girl. Honestly I just wanted her to be my friend but I believe that’s the problem with the guys. We over think a lot. A mere smile passed by a girl is enough for us to think that she is the one who’s going to be your wife and you will have kids with. Perhaps it is this ailment of over thinking and day dreaming which makes look the ‘Male Jaat’ desperate, cheap and needy what in fact is a sheer lack of capacity of being practical and accepting the reality. When it comes to emotions and relations we men prefer to be unreal and dreamy at least it renders us with a smile when our eyes are closed.

I didn’t open my eyes until I heard the pilot saying the outside temperature to be 25 degrees Celsius. It was way more in my head. I unbuckled my seatbelt, got up and without even looking at the girl who had just recently handed me a self- esteem crushing jolt, started walking. I couldn’t help but listen to what the girl was talking on her phone maybe yet again with her mother-

“Ya….just landed.”…

“I’ll tell you Manmeet the whole story…You’ll be in splits”…

“Yes dad’s here to pick me up at the airport…..you don’t worry!”…

“Bye..love you mammee…”

Wow! Manmeet was mammee, her boyfriend and now mammee was soon going to be narrated a story of a guy’s miserable and pathetic attempt at impressing a girl. He had a story to laugh at but the story’s very protagonist was here feeling distorted and dejected.

“Damn you Manmeet” I said (The word wasn’t damn….it was much more gross).

I just wished I could be in Manmeet’s shoes one day and made a resolve that here on while in a flight I’ll just stay quiet.

“This is not right yaar. I mean, how can people litter? It’s so uncool” He said, stroking her frizzled hair briskly. The “Get-a-girl 3.0″ manual had recommended that. He didn’t particularly warrant it – like everything else he had followed in the manual to get her. It has worked, so it must be the right way, he thought. Besides, that’s what he’d done with academics – “How-to-better-your-grades” by Mr. K. Nigam is a book that had given him an 8.6 in both of his first semesters.

“Have you heard Taylor Swift? She’s so cute yaar”, she said, simultaneously clasping his hip, just as her friends had told her to. Guys like girls who take the lead; textbook-style dating is something that’s cool, for both of you, they had said. All this social etiquette had worked! She’d become the most-talked of chick in her group and she loved it. All those years learning names of singers, surfing through America Top 20, learning to kiss online and those belly-dancing lessons. Now she had a guy, listened to cool music (m/ they say, she decided to look it up) and and some girl-friends who looked up to her. Academics was decent – class notes helped. Previous papers gave half the marks and an average was easy to get. She was content. Besides, like her sister Munni had told her before leaving for BITS, ” Don’t study too hard. Have fun. Enjoy. In the end, you’ll end up cooking for your husband”.

*

“You shouldn’t have looked at her the other day”, she said. “What am I here for? Am I not your girlfriend?”

“Arre, So what if I look at her? Is there a rule that a guy can’t look at other girls if he has girlfriend? Besides, I think she’s quite pretty. You can’t deny that.”

“Sigh. What is wrong with me, tell na. I’ll change for you”. She suddenly sounded very desolate. He pushed her away and left, stone-faced.

*

They waked toward each other.

“They’re going to talk now, Bollywood style” - Plebeian 1

“No they won’t. Just look at her face. I mean, you really think?” – Plebeian 2

Just when they were about to talk, the guy suddenly hurried to a trot. The girl whipped around and followed, eager to get it straight maybe. She finally caught up, overtook him and stopped in his tracks. He just looked and blinked stupidly. “Why ? why do you do this to me?”, she asked like a hoarse crow.

“I wanted to tell you long ago, but I didn’t have the guts. You’re not my type. Go. Don’t ever see me again. This is over”, and he stomped off.

She blinked, stupidly.

*

This is not a true account. I pray to God every time I go to the temple and convince Him that these people are Maya – the delusional persons who He sent to remind us to think. I hope He accepts my argument. I hope He won’t be mad at me for writing this fictional stuff.

Aerated drinks give me the feeling of writing an important exam. A weird feeling in the chest, like something is about to happen and I need a vial of adrenaline handy. I really don’t think that’s the purpose of a soda. It doesn’t make me feel K3wL either. I don’t mind a little preservatives so pulpy orange is my next choice.

This is about a boy, let me call him Shawn. Shawn is tall and handsome, is filled with talent and is unique. Shawn’s a student of BITS PILANI K.K.Birla Goa Campus, who was pursuing dual degree, one being B.E Electronics and Electrical and the other being of Love. He was in love with a girl studying in same campus. It had almost been a year, to be precise 11months and 6 days. They had been together all this time. From partying, playing, celebrating to the times of sorrows, bad results and injuries. Happiness and Sadness, they knew how to tackle each of them when they were together. They looked good as a couple, as everyone also said…

This 7^th day of 11^th month something happened that he might never forget. His girlfriend called him near C Mess at 12.30pm. He had also taken C Mess because of her. He had just woke up an hour ago or so and he wasn’t fully awake. But, seeing that he gets to see his love in the morning itself was nice thing to happen. It was always nice from his point of view to see her, and her smile. He went in a good mood, wobbling here and there, running through the corridors and then skidding at the end, jumping down the stairs, wishing good morning to those hostel mates who had a habit of sleeping late like him. When he met her and asked what was the matter, she told him that she’s not feeling right the way they two are going and that she wanted to break up. “It’s the end,” she said.

Dumbstruck Shawn, was frozen for the moment. Then, as anyone would, he asked, Why? She didn’t directly tell him, but gave him an indication that she didn’t find him faithful enough, in the 10minutes conversation they had, inclusive of all types of questions, reasons given by him, to prove what she felt for him was wrong.

Then, there was sudden darkness around him. He couldn’t lift up his face to see the sunshine. He was helpless, he couldn’t say no to her decision. They were not together anymore. He walked back to his hostel. But this time, way of walking was different – he was  walking straightly, in a disciplined manner, he didn’t look up, neither did he interact with any of the friends he saw in his way. His brain was at work, he was still thinking what had happened, why this all, and why to him only! Another thousand questions were striking his mind at the same time and he had no answer. Silent moment of life for him, but he didn’t cry.

As he stepped into his room, and sat on his cot, frustrated and shocked, he kept his hand on his forehead, as one does after doing a big mistake or having sever headache. His expressions were same but he didn’t have a headache or did any mistake anywhere. He just cared a bit more for her than she required. All the happy moments they had spent together were being played in his mind, like a slideshow. Walking on the beach bare foot hand in hand; attending the same lectures just so that they could sit together and talk; talking of future, of how many kids would they have and what would they name them; the first time he was resting in her lap and what not. One after another, they kept popping into his head and his mood was going off at an exponential rate.

Soon, a tear dropped from his eye.  As soon as this happened, he had a knock on his door. He wiped his tear, saw himself in the mirror to check if he’s looking fine and opened the door.  His best friends were standing outside. One of them asked him, “Chal, lets go for the lunch… We’re going…” That’s the kind of bond they had, they didn’t ask him if he wanted to go or not. They wouldn’t have left him without having food.  He didn’t say a word and followed the group as they were going. Seeing him in a state of silence, they encountered what was the matter. He trusted them, and told them that he had a break up. They asked what happened and he explained it in a crude and short way. Soon, they reached C Mess, the mess all of them had chosen.

As they were sitting on the table, having food, everyone was silent. No one spoke this day. Everyone was just having their food. They(whole group except Shawn) didn’t want it to be just like any other day, full of jokes, gossips, masti, etc. for it was a bad day for him. So, everyone was silent, just as was he. He didn’t utter a word and was having his dal rice half-heartedly. His mind was still questioning him, for it wanted an answer – “Why did it happened to him!??” He had thoughts of being with the same girl for whole life, someday, making her a part of his family and the life itself broke up with him.

As he was picking next spoonful of rice, some screaming from the table beside, disturbed him. As he looked up there, there was a group of 7 boys, having a laugh as one of them stole the ice-cream of another. He couldn’t understand their language, but he did see “life” in them. It’s a characteristic of human nature that when such an unlucky day hits your fate, you don’t want to be enlightened. You tend to increase the same feeling; you think of it over and over again, you hear to sad and slow songs, that, in some way are similar to your situation. Pretty same situation was Shawn going through. So, for the moment, he didn’t really like all the fun the other group was having. It was more kind of noise to him that irritated him. But then, I told you in the beginning that he was unique. He looked at his table and he observed that everyone was silent. He again looked at the other table, they were still having fun. It looked weird to him. They always used to have their kind of masti during the time they had their food. But, today they weren’t. Then, he realized, all of his group did this for him, and that they knew that he wouldn’t  feel good if they screamed, talked, played just like any other day. He knew his group was more fun-loving than on the table beside. He was amazed at the bond of friendship he had with them and the love they showed for him. For a fraction of second, he had a short smile on his face, realizing that his family is sitting in front of him and he’s worrying for the girl for whom he didn’t matter at all now. He promised himself that he’ll stop thinking about his ex and start life in a new way, for now he has found that he has enough jokers to make him laugh and enough shoulders to let him weep, when he needs to, in his group. Now, that they wouldn’t speak up, he broke the silence… and started talking, with a smile on his face . . .to his family. . .

Soon, the group was again chatting and screaming and joking around. Also, later, Shawn ate an extra ice cream, and You know it how!

His attitude! Their bond of Friendship! Hope!

“Why shouldn’t I, after all, it was I who discovered how to travel to parallel universes, so I think I can be trusted enough to use this gadget properly,” replied Andrew

“But it hasn’t even been tested yet, who knows what might go wrong with it, you can even lose your life, and even if you do travel to another universe, what if you can’t get back.” Ronald said.

“Well then that’s what we are here to find out aren’t we. Now let’s get this baby started.” said Andrew. The device wasn’t much, it was just a huge, clunky remote, and had 5 dials, 4 to set the 4 dimensions (coordinates for latitude, longitude, altitude and time) and the fifth one was for changing the universe they were in. It also had a huge ‘GO’ button which, well, made the user go from one point in the space time continuum to the next.

Andrew set the coordinates, and as soon as he pressed the red button, he vanished. Nah, not in a cloud of smoke or with a bright flash (though that would have been cool), and as told to him before, Ronald waited for Andrew to return. After what seemed like a few hours (it was really just about 15 minutes), Andrew appeared again, out of nowhere, looking all right though a bit weary.

“What happened?” asked Ronald, glad to see his friend back and happy that the device had worked.

“Oh let me catch my breath will you, and get me a glass of water, I’ve had one hell of a journey.” snapped Andrew.

“All right, all right, jeesh, isn’t it that time of the month for someone. Wait I’ll get you some water.” said Ronald.

After a nap, some food and some water, the time came for Andrew to finally tell his story. He took a shot of whiskey, gulped it down, then poured another one and started with. ”You remember me putting in the coordinates for the first universe I was travelling to. Well, it turns out that in that universe, there had been a huge Gamma radiation blast, and just like in the comics (and the movies based on comics, and the cartoons based on comics, and so on) , and everyone had turned into some kind of superhuman. You might think that having super powers is cool, but it’s really not in every case. Sure if you have powers like super speed and super strength, it’s really awesome, but imagine having something like increased smell, not increased sense of smell, just increased smell, as in body odour. It won’t be cool to have that would it? Or even something like healing factor, you might think it’s good to be able to heal at an increased rate, but have you thought about the fact that you won’t ever be able to skip school. Got a fever, it’ll wear off in 10 minutes. Got hit by a truck, it’ll take 15 minutes. Have AIDS, one day tops. Not looking so nice now is it? “

“Nah not really no, I don’t think I would have survived college if I had never been able to skip classes.” said Ronald.

“Exactly my point”, said Andrew, “Now let me continue. Now since all of them had superpowers, they kind of looked down upon those who do not. You can even say that they exterminated them, so that the only people who remained on the planet were those who were enhanced in some way or the other. It was kind of like what they did to witches in the past, only this time the people who die are those without powers. There’s no logic to it, really, what can someone who doesn’t have powers do to them. As soon as they got to know I didn’t have powers (via some douche whose power was to be able tell if others had powers or not), they tried to attack me. I barely managed to escape. Thank god I was vigilant enough to have changed the location on the dials of the remote. So as soon as I saw them turning on me, I pressed the button, and was carried to another dimension.”

“Whoa, that must have been really scary, thank goodness you escaped that. Now what happened in the next dimension?” asked Ronald.

Andrew replied: “Well, as soon as I came to my senses, I looked around and guess what I saw. I saw a world which was technologically very advanced. According to the time I was in, it shouldn’t have been any more advanced than we are now. But everywhere I could see flying cars, moving roads to take people from one place to the next, sort of like horizontal escalators. I hardly saw any church, or anything to show that religion existed. I think what must have happened was, Jesus Christ would not have been born. Because of that there was no such religion as Christianity, and hence no wars between the church and the olden day scientists. Due to this science must have advanced a lot faster at that time than it did in ours. I sort of felt like I had finally reached home, place where I finally belonged. What I found out after staying there for a little bit was that the people there too had started believing in a different kind higher power. They had made Science into their God. What they believed was, if they could unravel the mystery of science, they would end up in some sort of heaven as bodies of pure energy (much like the souls in our world). The only problem was, now the people were trying to convert everyone in the world (which consisted of three major landmasses, yes they were advanced enough to change the outer structure of the earth) to believe in their kind of Science. This had started a war between the three nations, one more damaging than would ever be seen. The people lived in constant threat of annihilation, as it could be any day that the enemy country decided to bomb their nation, and the weapons that had been developed were so destructive, that the results of such an attack would be catastrophic.”

Andrew continued “After seeing enough of that reality I decided to return to our universe. It’s been a good experience for me; it showed me how different even a single change in our timeline can entirely twist the world. There was one thing I learned from the last universe though. No matter how advanced we become, we would always want to look up to something greater than ourselves. For the believers there is God and for the atheists there is science. There will always be something whose mysteries we would want to unravel. I think I’ll keep this device hidden. I don’t want other people to know what it can do, because dabbling in something like parallel universes might result in disaster. I don’t know what would have happened if a rogue superhuman somehow came to this world; or if someone from this world went to the advanced dimension and come back with a new technology. There surely would have been a fight over the possession of that.”

Ronald replied “Yeah, I also think that is the best course of action to take. I think you should rest now, we’ll talk more about this later.”

“All right, be sure to close the door when you leave, I’ll be taking a nap now. Goodnight old friend,” said Andrew.

“Goodnight to you too, buddy,” was Ronald’s reply when he left the room, with a big boxy bulge in his coat pocket.

Oh, and the thing that really FML was, that I had come back after consuming 7 beers just 10 days before this incident.